They say things come in 3's. Perhaps.
The last time I did a stint in the online realm I met 3 consecutive Nicks. Well, at least I believe they were Nicks. Their profile names were Nick and they never corrected me. And it was the 3rd Nick who I actually ended up going out with a few times.
As I've been serving time in this current tour I've met 3 guys named Joe. Well, again, their profile names were all "Joe" only I did get corrected at a later time from the one that his name was actually Nick, and the other turned out to be Joey. But Joey is close enough to Joe, so fine. I'll rant about the stupidity of putting a different name on your profile than your own at a later date.
The point being that even the guys seem to come in 3's. And definitely follow a pattern. The last Nick, although a nice guy was pretty boring. Before we met we were chatting through mail and one of his first questions to me was "what do you consider adventurous?" It was a multiple choice answer form and the choices were things like trying a new restaurant (being the most boring) to white water rafting (being the most adventurous). Seeing as how I had recently been white water rafting, had a near death experience falling out of my raft and getting trapped under water, and then forced myself to go again the next year so I could get over my fears, I feel pretty justified in my answer of white water rafting.
Well this Nick- he also said he was really adventurous. And although the fact we bonded over a mutual like of Star Trek maybe would have been a warning to some, I thought it was cool. I grew up watching the Next Generation with my father. However... well, Nick was currently re-watching all the episodes on You Tube. So mine was kind of a nostalgia thing, his was more of a current obsession. But still, something to bond over.
So I kind of had high hopes for this Nick. Hopes that at least the date wouldn't be a tragedy. Of course at the time I still believed people were for the most part normal and didn't realize the depths to which such a meet up could possibly sink. So maybe it was just ignorance that didn't have me a little scared of the weirdo that could be waiting for me on the other end. Plus the guy wanted to meet at a sushi bar because I mentioned I love sushi and he had only tried it once. So cool. Showing a little bit of the adventurous.
In the end things didn't work out between myself and Nick. Although he was nice, once we got past the Star Trek connection there really wasn't much there. Also as it turned out we had very VERY different definitions of what adventurous meant. When I asked him the most adventurous things he had ever done, his response was that he had used horse manure as fertilizer the year before. He had made a little garden on his patio and done half with chemical fertilizers and half with horse manure. All I could think was "gross!" Mixed with a little bit of "Nerd."
Now don't get me wrong, he was a nice guy and there is a girl out there that will find that extremely fascinating. Like my cousin who is the ultimate nerd of all nerds and damn proud of it. He has a very nice wife. Who amazingly isn't turned off by all the nerdiness. Although they don't share all the same interests/geek tendencies, she is totally content to do her own thing while he lives his virtual life in World of Warcraft instead of you know... having a real life. Suffice it to say though this was the moment I realized he was the "try a new restaurant" personality and I was the "white water rafting" type. We said good bye that day, and I'm pretty sure from the fact neither mentioned anything about seeing the other again, we both knew this just wasn't happening.
Anyway, after that I had decided to retire the Nicks. 3 strikes and you're out. Had I known Joe #1 was really Nick #4 I wonder if I would have given him the time of day. That mixed with his PMS'ing and drama I think would have pushed things into the HELL NO category. (PMS'ing is annoying enough when girls do it. At least they have evil hormones racing through their body wreaking havoc on their insides to blame for it. It's all nature (that bitch), it can't be controlled no matter how many pills we try and pop. Really, this is very unbecoming of a boy who has nothing to blame but his own asshole personality.)
I digress. Let's get back to the 3's. Well so as I've mentioned I have moved on to Joes. There have now been 3 Joes from this latest trist. Technically. Joe #1 (aka Nick #4)- EPIC FAILURE. Joe #2- Flop. Joe #3- Hum... we shall have to see.
This Joe #3- not only is he #3, but it took 3 dates to FINALLY meet the guy. Yes, it has finally happened. 50 Reasons rescheduled, and on the 3rd try he did not get sick. Amazing, but true. I half expected him to cancel again. I think that is why I wasn't nervous this time until I was actually walking to the place for us to meet up. Until that point I had been waiting for the call that he was yet again sick. Only this time I was going to tell him that things just shouldn't be this hard, and I was at the point of thinking this just wasn't meant to be. That is what I was going to tell him at least. In my mind I would have been thinking "So the truth has come out. And the verdict is... EVIL."
So yes, I met 50 Reasons, aka Joe #3. And he seemed... NORMAL! They do exist. Shocking. Disbelief. Wow. Not only normal, but intelligent! Because let's face it. With the last guy the bar got set pretty low for normal. Basically the criteria was that his profile photo had to be at least slightly resembling his current state of physical appearance (it was), his job had to be what he listed it as (check), not brag about doing anything illegal (check check), be on time (he was early), And KEEP HIS PANTS ON (Thank God he did... although between the two I would much rather see this guy's pants off. Just saying).
He passed all these and then went above and beyond. Intelligent, pretty decent looking, and he made me laugh. Ding Ding Ding Ding, we have a winner! At least I hope so. A little to early to say much more than I really hope I have the opportunity to get to know this guy better. Like you know, an official date would be pretty cool. But the point of this blog is how pathetic my dating life is, so in accordance with that I can expect him to not contact me again.
My mother is so funny. She knew where I was and when we were meeting so she actually walked by the cafe to check him out! Before I left she warned me she might do this. She told me to sit so my back was to the window so she could check him out. The first time we were scheduled to meet she told me she had planned to do this and I had told her I was glad he had canceled in that case. How awkward to look up and see my mother. No, my family isn't over bearing or weird at all, not in the slightest bit. My mother just has to, you know, give her approval on you before we can continue. By this time though, I was resigned and told her if he was there first I was sitting in which ever seat was still open. Later that night when I talked to her one of the first things she asked was "so is he Asian? He looked Asian." I'm pretty sure he might be Italian. But you know, Asian, Italian, they are so similar. Right....
Sitting there across from him did make me realize one thing. Reading Jen Frase's blog (http://jenfrase.blogspot.com/) has really gotten into my subconscious. I don't watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette and really really can't stand reality TV. Especially these canned dating shows that have people bawling their eyes out about being in love with someone they just met and have never actually spent a real day with in real life situations. There are a couple of words that come to mind when I see the people on this show. Obsessive, Psycho, Daddy issues... What these people need is a room full of psychiatrists. The one place where I do have interest in this show though is reading her blog. You don't even have to watch the show, her recap is still hilarious. And the stick she repeatedly uses to measure the attractiveness of the guys on this show is can she see him hot and sweaty on top of her? If the answer is yes- he is hot, if the answer is no- he is not.
The reason I know this has gotten way to far into my subconscious is because as I as staring across the table last night, that rule totally popped into my head. Does the thought of this guy hot and sweaty on top of me turn me on or off? Here he is going on about how the systems in a power plant work (which was quite interesting) and in my head I'm analyzing whether or not I would want to get it on with him. How's that for a first 30 minutes of the night? Yah, I am totally listening to the words coming out of your mouth, not at all trying to picture what you might look like with your brow all covered in sweat. But in the interest of being able to carry on the conversation and not look like a dufus form being lost as he was trying to explain, I managed to get the thought tucked away for later analyzation. 30 minutes was way to early to be making that call when it's a real person interacting with me and not just someone on TV I'm fantasizing about on mute.
Ok, well so that was Joe #3. Regardless if I hear from him again Joe is now retired. What's remaining at this time is to know if it will go up on the wall of fame or the wall of shame right there next to "Nick".
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